I Couldn't Make This Up If I Tried

Jason and I decided to go to dinner Friday night. We picked a tiny, local Thai place, but once we got there we noticed it was extremely busy, so we decided to try another place. The second place was closed. Not like closed for the day, but closed for good. So we picked a third restaurant and got right in.

We were seated at a small table for two, right between two other small tables for two. We noticed a table nearby with a man and woman who ordered chips and queso as an appetizer (which looked really good!), so we decided to order some too. Our waitress nodded over at the other table and said, "Oh... they actually just got the last batch of chips... and we don't have time to make more. So... I guess you don't want an appetizer?" Jason and I thought it was interesting how she didn't even offer a suggestion for another appetizer instead. Plus, the fact that they weren't planning to make more chips! So we just ordered our food.

A few minutes later, a table nearby received their appetizer of spinach dip and chips! So we flagged down our waitress and told her that the other table had chips and asked if we could reorder our appetizer of chips and queso.

In the meantime, the two ladies at the small table next to us received their food. As soon as the plates were on the table, one of the ladies loudly told the waitress, "When the time comes, we'd like separate checks." Not a big deal, but she said it really loud and matter-of-fact--almost like it was an issue.

Across the room, there was a table of college-aged kids. One girl had an shrill, loud laugh and kept laughing over and over. It was one of those laughs that almost makes you jump because it catches you off guard. She laughed like this a lot.

As we're eating our appetizer, the man and woman at the table nearby with the chips and queso received their food. I overheard the woman ask the man if his food was hot. A minute later, she flagged down the waitress and told her that their food wasn't warm. The waitress apologized and took the food back to the kitchen. The next thing we know, the couple is getting up from their table, gathering their jackets and leaving! They didn't leave any money on the table to pay for their appetizer or drinks. They just left!

A few minutes later, a man who looked like a manager walked through the room. We could tell he was looking for the couple whose food wasn't warm. He went up to a table with a little boy, his mom and grandmother. We couldn't hear what was said, but it seemed he was assuming they were the ones with cold food. The young mom pointed to the (now empty) table where the man and woman were sitting. I think the manager figured it out pretty fast.

At this point, our food came (which was warm!) and a new couple sat down at the small table on the other side of us. Because our tables were so close to each other, we could hear--for the most part--what they were saying. They had a lot of small talk: the guy said he "may or may not have read all of the Twilight books" and was planning to see the newest movie. The girl listed a few things that sounded good from the menu including baja tacos. Except, she didn't say "baja," she said "ba-jaw." I guess she failed Spanish 101...

As we're eating, the girl across the room with the shrill laugh is still laughing. The girl next to us starts talking about a new dessert bar in town called The Choc'late Mousse Pie Bar (which, by the way, is amazing!). The guy had never heard of this place, so the girl starts explaining the concept: graham cracker crust is poured in the bottom of a glass, then you choose a pie filling and it's topped with mousse. "But a not a real moose," the girl said, "mousse like whipped cream." The funny thing is, she wasn't joking when she said "a real moose." She was dead serious.

Across the room, I noticed three ladies sitting at a table. Two of the ladies were feeling the forehead of one lady as if she might have a fever. Not what you want to see while you're eating.

A few minutes later, I heard coughing, which I didn't really think much of. Except that I noticed the mom of the little boy frantically wiping her table and pants and the front of the little boy's shirt. Then she shouted across the table at the grandmother, "I didn't force feed him! No... I didn't force feed him!" I'm not sure what that was all about, but the little boy had gotten sick at the table!

In the meantime, the girl next to us bluntly said, "Well, the reason I wanted to meet tonight was to talk about what happened the other night. I'm not afraid of awkwardness, so I'm just going to jump right into it." We couldn't hear everything that was said between the girl and guy next to us, but it was pretty awkward--and it didn't even involve us!

At this point, we were just about finished with our food and I was more than ready to get out of there! I don't think I've ever been out to eat where there was so much going on at once!

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